Kindness

In so many places in The Bible the message is clear...treat others the way you want to be treated (love others as you love yourself).  As I think back over the years about the people I wasn't the nicest to, or the people who weren't so great to me, I realize a consistent underlying issue...unhappiness.  All it takes is a little bit to cause out lashes in the form of giving someone a hard time, picking on someone, criticizing, gossiping...the list goes on...  Another major culprit is insecurity.  I remember as a teenager trying to find flaws in girls to make myself feel better, or to feel more secure in my relationship.  It is pretty common in the teenage years when you are trying to figure everything out.  Now as adults we really need to do our best to keep it in check.  I know it can be difficult when we don't feel well, aren't happy with our looks, struggling to make ends meet.  How can we "love" others when we don't even love ourselves?!  It is easy to turn and cut down on the glamourous woman you see at the grocery store or hate on the rich people who seem to have it all.  Honestly, sometimes we encounter difficult people who seemingly deserve the barrage we are spewing in our minds.  However, I am here to tell you it is not healthy.  There are multiple, unrelated sources in my life that are constantly exclaiming, "What you put out in the world comes back to you!"  Yes, even thoughts!

One thing I have to address is gossip!  I could devote an entire post to this topic.  I want to say that it is toxic!  It is very hurtful, usually based on lies or inflations, and it pollutes so much around us.  It might be tempting to participate in gossip, but it will also poison you in return.  There is so much else to talk about!  I challenge you to change the subject next time you are involved in a gossip-based conversation.  And change it to something positive!  That way you can walk away or hang-up with a smile on your face instead of feeling yucky.

In the last year I have seen a major shift in the way I perceive angry, miserable people.  In the past they may have riled me up, maybe I would even "stand-up" by pushing back on them, but now I really feel sorry for them.  I realize that they must really be going through something in their lives.  Either something current, or a past wound that was never healed.  Something that I will post about in the future is the great amount of pain people are currently in in our world.  We all have something (or multiple things) and for some reason none of us know how to resolve it.  One thing that would be a lot cheaper than therapy would be if we all started by treating each other with kindness.  How "Hippie" of me, right?!  I know!  When it comes  down to it we all want to feel like we matter.  That is why it is so important to be sure to thank and tip your waiter/waitress, say "hi" to the janitor where you work, be patient with the telemarketer on the other end of the phone...  Would you want to be a telemarketer?!  I wonder what their suicide rate is with people always hanging up on them, or worse yet yelling at them?!  At least I just pretend I can't hear them...HELLO, HELLO, HELLO???  I digress...

All kidding aside, next time someone is unpleasant try your best to be patient and kind with them, knowing that you can go on with your happy life, but not knowing where they have to go after your interaction...cancer treatment, an abusive spouse, a miserable job...  Maybe you aren't heading off to a pleasant situation yourself...all the more reason to be nice!  You can probably relate to how they are feeling.  Try to adopt this "kindness philosophy" with everyone...unpleasant and pleasant alike.  Sometimes when I am out and about I will see people who remind me of loved ones (around the same age, stature, whatever), and just because of that I smile at them, and it is a nice little exchange that probably made both of us feel a little better.  It doesn't take much!  Start small and it will grow, and Lord knows our world could use more kindness!  You will start to notice that it comes back to you multiplied!  :-)